What is #CancerRoadTrip and how did it come to be? Read this post to get the backstory!
Once upon a time, decades ago, I graduated from Wharton. I worked in the private placement market in New York–the smallest deal amount was a quarter of a billion (that was real money in those days); I worked on the first billion dollar leveraged buy-out (Congoleum).
I rather got Gordon Gecko. After all, I moved in that amoral world of money and finance. There was no room for feeling or care. Numbers, numbers, numbers. No room for error. No need for human contemplation.
I’ve been away from the corporate world for a long time now, but it seems nothing much has changed. The numbers have gotten bigger. The leverage greater. I wonder if it isn’t all primed to blow like the building in my dream last night.
If it is, it’s a good time to sell the house. If it isn’t, oh well! I’ve never been very good at tactical decisions. Strategic movements and trends are more my forte. I listened to an interview with Jim Rogers the other day.What an interesting life he has led. His aw shucks southern drawl may mask a brilliant mind to those not in the know, but his reputation precedes him. I admire him. If you don’t know who Jim Rogers is, here is the interview (Jim Rogers comes in at 13:22):
Jim Rogers has had two amazing #RoadTrips. One around the world on his motorcycle: Investment Biker: Around the World with Jim Rogers; the other around the world in a bit more comfort via automobile. An adventurer, in capital markets and in life.
“Dreaming permits each and every one of us to be quietly and safely insane every night of our lives.” ~William Dement
I wake up terrified. A heaviness sits on my chest. I feel paralyzed.
In the dream, a team of men in black run through a building laying small charges along the floor, then splashing everything with some sort of flammable liquid. The building is empty. Concrete floors and metal furniture.
I see this happening yet I am at an outdoor cafe with friends. One of them had just been diagnosed with breast cancer and she was sitting, topless, enjoying the sun. She swung her beautiful long hair from side to side. I clamored out of my seat. I had to go. I had to leave.
I collected my things in a brown paper bag and I started walking away. I left behind a blue and white chinese porcelain pot that I just love. I couldn’t carry it with me. I could just see it sitting there, one of my favorite possessions, and I had to leave it. I crossed the street, walked along side of the stone building and quickly turned the corner.
I walked more quickly; I ran; another block and another, putting buildings between me and the coming explosion. When the building blew, I wanted to avoid the debris that would fly through the air.
But nothing happened.
We were expected to go back to work tomorrow in the building that was primed to blow.
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What is #CancerRoadTrip and how did it come to be? Read this post to get the backstory!
What is #CancerRoadTrip and how did it come to be? Read this post to get the backstory!
I have spent enough time grumbling. I am determined to be joyful and embrace this adventure.
Thus:
I am grateful for the freedom to pick up and go.
I am grateful to have the options I have.
I am grateful that the tech creeps showed their true colors now rather than later.
I am grateful that I have a good home for Chanel to go to.
I am grateful for my relative health.
I am grateful for my friends who continue to be super supportive.
I am grateful to have a house to sell, in a strong market with little inventory.
I am grateful for the amazing people that are part of my life through Anti-Cancer Club.
I am grateful for having learned to meditate.
I am grateful for knowing that a sense of completeness lies within me, not without.
I am grateful for the adventures before me.
#Gratitude
#Namaste
Last night I had dinner with Vanessa who is a concert violinist. She once sold everything she had and hit the road for a series of concerts and competitions she organized. She understands the emotional tug and pull of such an adventure.
“One day I was high, the next day depressed,” she confided. The import of letting go of routine and embracing adventure is not a pure path.
“Good things are coming down the road. Just don’t stop walking.”-Robert Warren Painter, Jr.
And a journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step.
What is #CancerRoadTrip and how did it come to be? Read this post to get the backstory!
Always remember that you are unique, just like everyone else.
–Margaret Mead
On Twitter this week, this caught my eye. It’s from the Parisian surgeon Olivier Branford whose tweets I enjoy enormously.
For a while, I rather enjoy some routine. It’s great to know where the good snow is on a mountain. To know that you’re likely to find lift next to the ridge. To know that it’s Friday night and you’re playing tennis and doing dinner afterwards. Routine can be nice.
But we can become so mired in our routines that we forget there’s a big world out there. We lose our spontaneity. And then the routine becomes a deepening rut.
I remember being at Ashland the year I was on the road with Whiskey Oscar. I was lucky enough to get a standing room only spot in the back of the theatre, and then after intermission a front row seat! The performance was Macbeth and it was stunning.
At intermission, I sat on a stone wall and watched the crowd. I felt like I knew who all these people were, without having ever met them. They all moved in a certain way; said the appropriate thing; played their small role in a social medley without a flaw.
It was a perfect ordinary event, but it gave me an eerie feeling. I felt as though I was watching a dance and everyone wore a mask. The mask –a combination of clothes and mannerisms, musts and must nots–tightly defined them. I just watched, feeling very disconnected on the one hand, but also very connected to a deep sense the familiarity of the scene. I’d been there so many times in my life. But now I seemed to look in from some other place. I had no routine or mask to define my presence.
Once again, I feel like I’m looking at a life, but this time it’s mine. It’s like watching a slow motion crash. It’s almost an out of body experience as I do the tasks I must do to sell the house; to pack; to say goodby to my beloved Chanel. This can’t be happening; I don’t want to be #HomelessWithCancer, even on an adventure. But events are now beyond my control. The only control I have is to let go.
Inspiration, joy & discovery through travel. Oh, did I mention with supposedly incurable cancer?
What's on your bucket list?
Thank you for stopping by!
CancerRoadTrip is about making lemonade out of lemons.
As you read my story, you may want to start at the beginning to "grok" how CancerRoadTrip came to be. You can click here to start at the end (which is actually the beginning) and read forward! The posts are chronological, with the most recent posts appearing on the front page.
Jim Rogers has had two amazing #RoadTrips. One around the world on his motorcycle: Investment Biker: Around the World with Jim Rogers
